it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
