so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
