Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
