I like to think it a success when the cops are called
kristin has been a bad kristin
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
