Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
