Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
