i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
