I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
