This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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