If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
