you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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