The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
