i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
