Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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