I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
