john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I intend to get homeless drunk
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
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