The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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