i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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