i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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