Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
