whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
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