white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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