All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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