Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
