Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
