i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
ugly people sure do ruin things
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
