Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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