I'm so fucking centered right now
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
and she was petting her beer can
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
