the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
