i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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