Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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