This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
