Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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