ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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