i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
