I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
