So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
