My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
