is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
