He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just high enough for therapy.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
