I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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