Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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