Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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