Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i came on her dog
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
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