You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize