How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
