who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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