More tranny stories later!
Please, let me fuck your mom
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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