apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
