Small penises have feelings too.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
