There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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